THE PARTY IS UNDERWAY

I know that because Lance said so.  About 45 minutes after this picture was taken, after his triumphant finish and all the awards and the big ceremony, we were lucky enough to snag a quote on "how he felt" (editors note: Mr. Seaweed once again delivered a thoughtful, original, and probing question). One thing about Lance Armstrong, when you ask him a question, he looks you straight in the eye. His response was very heartfelt, "I'm tired. Tired, but happy." He looked it too. Someone asked if the party had begun and that's when the truth came out, "The party started last night," he said.  For each of it's 101 years, the Tour de France has finished in Paris. Once they arrive, the boys race eight laps back and forth on the Champs Elysse. That's Lance in yellow. His day. A great American hero.

WE'LL ALWAYS HAVE PARIS

...... To quote the great Humphrey Bogart. Wandering around Paris for a few hours the next day, I began to feel an urgent need to drain the monster. Heading back to the hotel I came across an old Frenchman playing his violin on a bridge above the Seine. This guy was absolutely wonderful. All I could think of was Bogie's last moments with Ingrid Bergman in Casablanca: "If that plane leaves the ground and you're not with him, you'll regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life ...... But what about us? ..... We'll always have Paris." Nice line, but I needed a bathroom. Came back later and he was gone.

A  WORD FOR OUR SPONSORS

Champion Nutrition. A longtime sponsor of the Bone Cycling Team, I even brought them to France with me. In the photo (taken around Giverney) I'm holding a bottle of Revenge, their awesome sports drink that I never leave home without. I also use Champion's Met Endurance before I work out (orange smoothie of course) and I have a Champion Ultramet protein shake every day as well. Furthermore, I can HIGHLY recommend their Chocolate Fudge Snack Bar. Yowzah! (12g of protein, 3g of fat, 180 calories) Great company, great product.

Cingular. This picture was taken in Le Grand Bornand, high in the French Alps, right before phoning in one of many radio reports on my badass Cingular phone. Shameless plug I know, but this phone was really nice. That, and they were good enough to lend it to me for the entire trip. Sweet! By the way, this thing worked everywhere, even the Alps. In Europe, their mobile phones (as they call them) use satellites. Yes, they got us on that one. By the way, mine was a Sony Ericsson camera phone and I see that they even have a deal on that phone on their website. A huge thanks to Cingular. Great service.

PARIS IN JULY

Have we mentioned our affection for French women yet? Thing about it is, great looking women are everywhere in Paris. Absolutely gorgeous women. Honestly, I'd been trying not to notice. No, really I was. Then, out of nowhere, Veronique appeared and I was ready to leave my wife (editors note: Kidding!).  See, there's a reason the Parisians have all those outdoor cafe's - people watching and dog watching.

SHAMELESS TOURIST

The Eiffel Tower had no practical use when they built it in 1889.  Somebody just wanted to show off their engineering skills. Nice job. But after 20 years they almost tore it down. Luckily somebody else figured out that it would make a great antenna, which it did. This picture was taken on a boat ride down the Seine after a night time bike ride around Paris on fat-tire beach cruisers. By the way, the French are still bickering about this thing - The hard-core traditionalists like to bitch about the sparkling lights at night. S'il vous plaît!

PHOTOS AROUND PARIS

It says "Read My Apocalips"

The most famous museum in the world, the Louvre. Two famously hot women reside there - Mona Lisa and Venus de Milo. 15 years ago they installed a new entrance - the ultra-modern glass pyramid right in the middle of the courtyard of a 400 year-old building. Yes, there was controversy about that too. Took this photo on the fat-tire ride at sunset

The Arch de Triomph. What's that guy looking at?

Zee Krazee Americans! Zey Love Lance!

S*** Happens. But it ain't as bad as they make it out to be.

Paris Ragtime

More Podium Girls. In Yellow, Even

Le Mégère. This cat lived on top of whatever car was parked in front of the Hotel Du Levant. It hated Doug. We don't know why.

What they ride on the streets of Paris. Seriously.

Pont Sully. (The Sully Bridge) The man is big in Paris.

LIVESTRONG
Yellow bracelets are everywhere.

They say "LIVESTRONG" and they're all about surviving cancer. At the Lance Armstrong Foundation, they believe that in the battle against cancer, knowledge is power and attitude is everything. Thirty years ago when my own mother died of cancer, there wasn't alot of hope. You just died. Nowadays people are surviving cancer in huge numbers. At this moment, 10 million people are living with cancer. How does the LAF help? By providing the practical information and tools that people need to battle cancer and live strong.

Yellow wakes me up in the morning.
Yellow gets me on the bike every day.
Yellow has taught me the true meaning of sacrifice.
Yellow makes me suffer.
Yellow is the reason I am here.
     -Lance Armstrong, 7 year cancer survivor

THE BONE IN FRANCE?

I keep telling you we've got a worldwide listening audience! We saw these signs every 10 minutes on the French Freeways. I thought it was pretty cool that a radio station with the same frequency as the Bone was sponsoring litter pick up. So I tuned in to 107.7. It's the traffic information channel.

DEATH BY LIGHTNING BOLT

More French road signs. If you die in a crash, they put up one of these in your honor. Sometimes they're every mile or so. Sometimes you get a sign that says "In the next three miles, 14 people have been killed in the last 18 months. Please drive carefully." Most of the time you're driving through some pretty spectacular countryside though.

ODESSA GUNN
Former pro bike racer. Married to Levi Leipheimer from Santa Rosa (He was 9th in the Tour and is representing USA at the Athens Olympics). She is very hot and has a cute little chihuahua with her at all times. Very European. Like most professional bike racers, they live in Europe most of the time. That's Doug interviewing her for a KCBS report.

GIVERNY

Went to the famous painter Monet's house in Giverny. He wasn't home. We waited. So did alot of other tourists. It got kinda boring so we went for a bike ride in the French countryside. All of a sudden we weren't bored. That's me standing on the bridge on the lily pond at Giverny where Monet whipped out the infamous "Le Bassin aux nymphéas." Guy never showed up so we went out and had pizza.

THE MIGHTY PRESS PASS
Hanging around my neck. Invaluable. Basically, it's your backstage pass. It's your ticket inside. It gets you on roads that are closed to the public. It lets you interview the racers. Even Lance. You can ride on the race course after it's closed. And it gets you FREE FOOD in the press room! Wherever the finish line is, the locals provide sustenance for all the pigs-at-the-trough media. Of which I was one (of 400). But it was always excellent French Food. And the only press room on the planet where they serve both wine and brie.

MORE PHOTOS

Tough Gig.
In the French Alps near the swiss border.

Snowboarding in July?
Yes. On Alpe d'Huez.

Golden Retrievers in July?
Yes. On Alpe d'Huez.

OK, One More.